Sorry for the lack of posts.

The episode I wanna talk about now is “We’re In The Money”, from season 1.

In this episode, Dan gets $500.00 on his check for work he’s done. Dan wants a bell for his boat, Roseanne wants the perfume “Submission”, & Becky wants a pair of designer jeans. But they also realize if they behave with their money, they can get caught up on their bills. In the beginning, Darlene gets caught lying.

Dan: Why’d you lie?
Darlene: Well, I thought I could get away with it.

Hey, atleast she told the truth there, lmfao.

I love when Dan bought home the $500.00 and showed the family.

Dan: You call Dan-Dan: The Drywall Man!

Roseanne: You deserve a kiss! Becky, kiss your Dad!

Roseanne: If there’s any money left, we were thinking about spending it on you kids.
Kids: Alright!
Roseanne: I don’t think we should tell them.
Kids: On what?
Roseanne: We were gonna build you your own swimming pool!
Kids: Yay!
Roseanne: With a 50 foot water slide!
Kids: Yay!
Roseanne: And a pet shark!
Dan: Hurray!

I love that. They didn’t even have a comeback to that. They just walked out of the kitchen.

Later they were talking about what they’d buy. First, Dan called the perfume “Subscription”. Then he kept touching her & kissing her, going “And you’d put a little dab here…”. Her reply was “Get away you’re making me puke!”. Aaah, love is in the air.

Dan: We have to handle this money like adults.
Roseanne: Fine. We’ll be adults. But I don’t wanna.
Dan: Roseanne, you will act like an adult!
Roseanne: You can’t make me!

Of course, after they decide to act like adults, they end up going against their words. Roseanne buys the perfume, & Dan buys the bell.

First off, we can’t forget when Darlene catches Dan with the bell. Dan tells her not to tell her Mother about it.

Darlene: Oooh, you want me to lie!

Remember, they gave Darlene a lesson on lying earlier in the episode.

Roseanne, in the meantime, is trying to hide the perfume by telling Dan she rearranged where the groceries go. When Dan catches her with the perfume, she insists on taking it back. But Dan insists she can keep it & he’ll buy the bell.

[This quote may not be exact:]

Roseanne: You already bought that bell!
Dan: I did not.
Roseanne: You bought the bell!
Dan: [Still insisting he didn't.]
Roseanne: Look me in the eye and tell me you didn’t buy that bell.
Dan: [Looks her in the eye.] I did not buy that bell.

That’s when DJ comes in ringing the very bell Dan apparently didn’t buy.

Dan: Ask for not which the bell tolls.
Roseanne: It tolls for thee, butthead!

[I'm not sure if Dan's quote is correct. Feel free to let me know though.]

So in the end, I can’t quite remember if they paid off the bills or kept their things. I need to re-watch this one & refresh my memory. But I do know that they ended up buying Becky a pair of designer jeans.

Becky: I’ll have to wash ‘em one more time before I wear ‘em to school so they’ll be even tighter!
Roseanne: How popular are you trying to be?!

It ends with Dan giving Roseanne a foot massage while singing “This Little Piggy”.

I love this show though. I haven’t watched this particular episode in awhile though. But I still love it.

By the way, I got some of the quotes from http://www.tv.com/roseanne/show/54/summary.html

I like to give credit where credit is due, lol.