“And it’s signed the tornado man!”…Favorite Roseanne Episode.
So this one is an open discussion entry. For all readers.
What is your favorite Roseanne episode?
You can name more than one if you can’t decide.
I have many, but my favorite has got to be “Toto, We’re Not in Kansas Anymore” from season one. The one where they had a tornado warning. I can’t watch a bunch of episodes without putting this one on. It still cracks me up ’til this day.
Random quotes:
Dan: Take a deep breath. You know what that smells like? (he puts a garbade can near Roseanne and walks away) What’s the word I’m looking for?
Roseanne: Garbage.
Dan: There’s nothing like the air before a storm. It’s so stimulating.
Roseanne: I feel the same way about laundry.
(Jackie is getting money from Dan)
Jackie: Fork over the bread, Fred.
Dan: Don’t hurry back, Jack.
Jackie: Thanks for the cash, stupid.
(both Roseanne and Dan are walking around in the dark and they bump into each other, making both of them scream)
Crystal: (yelling) Oh, what is it?!
Dan: Nothing.
Roseanne: (fake upset) I just bumped into my future and it was hideous!
(after telling the kids to get away from the window)
Darlene: What good’s a tornado if you can’t see it?
Roseanne: Oh, yeah, you’re right. Why don’t you guys go out and play?
after listening to the tornado report on the radio)
Becky: Aren’t we supposed to be doing something?
Roseanne: Well, what’s the worst that could happen? Okay, the tornado picks up our house and slams it down in a better neighborhood.
Becky: Mother, this is no time to kid around.
Roseanne: Yeah, you’re right. Okay, everybody, panic!
Roseanne: That’s not funny! You’re grounded ’til menopause.
Darlene: Yours or mine?
Roseanne: Your father’s.
[The menopause quote cracks my Mother up EVERY time we watch it!]
(After Dan realizes he shouldn’t use the phone during the storm)
Becky: But I gotta call Diane and tell her I can’t come tonight!
Roseanne: Well, you can tell her later when her house flies by our window.
Jackie: Roseanne, I want to LIVE!
Roseanne: Think it over!
Aaaah, I love this episode. If the TV wasn’t in use, I’d love to watch it now!
Feel free to reply & share your favorite episodes!
I knew a lot of these quotes, but it’s easier to check & see if they’re correct.
“If any guy puts his tounge in my mouth, I’ll puke.”
Wow. I’m really sorry this hasn’t been updating. I had a busy weekend.
I do want to go through more episodes, but I want to watch a few more this week first, since I didn’t get to last week.
Of course, not every entry will be about specific episodes. Right now, I’m going to share some quotes I found funny or memoriable. Feel free to respond & share your own! 
Some of these might not be EXACT quotes, but I’m trying to get them as close as I can.
Dan: Damn woman! Who the hell do they think they are?
Roseanne: We’re sugar and spice and everything nice. So bite me!
Roseanne: I’m way more powerful than any law
Jackie [stoned]: Deeee Jaaaaay
Becky: I have to call Diane and tell her I can’t come over tonight!
Roseanne: Well, you can tell her later when her house flies by our window.
Becky: Darlene, why don’t you just kiss my butt?
Darlene: Well haul it on over here, jumbo!
Darlene: If any guy puts his tounge in my mouth, I’ll puke.
Roseanne: That’ll be a good way to get a second date.
Roseanne: That’s not funny! You’re grounded ’til menopause!
Darlene: Yours or mine?
Roseanne: Your father’s!
[After realizig Becky was in the garage getting her pets in the middle of a tornado warning.]
Roseanne: Let’s go get her & beat the hell out of her before the tornado gets her!
Becky: No way, you’re cheating.
Darlene: Becky, how can Nana Mary cheat at cutting cards?
Jackie: It’s HER deck, einstien.
Nana Mary: Just for that you’re out of the will.
[I definitely spelled "einstien" wrong, lol. If I remember, I'll look it up & fix it later.]
DJ: Are you leaving?
Nana Mary: Yes, I have to.
DJ: Why?
Nana Mary: Your Mother doesn’t want me around.
Roseanne: You’re a horrible old lady.
Nana Mary: Yes, and just think, in 40 years you’re going to be exactly like me!
Roseanne: I heard you laid down the law.
Becky: Who told you?
Roseanne: It was on the news.
Darlene: You think we don’t get your corny little sex jokes.
Roseanne: You are our corny little sex jokes.
That’s it for now. I’m sure there will be more random quote entries again!
By the way….
I do sit here & remember quite a few quotes from different Roseanne episodes. However, for future reference, I get some of ‘em, plus reminders of what happened in any episodes I don’t remember, in here:
